a new kind of terrorism

Julian Assange Wikileaks named Man of the Year by Le Monde

is that which is an attentive over-saturation of a subject or idea. it is not the commitment an idea. take for an example, a suicide bomber who erupts onto the scene with a block of C4 strapped their chest. They don’t want die, but because of their over-saturation an idea they must die. this is very different from the traditional concept in the word commitment.

commitment tends to be driven by desire.

a desire either for some type of change or for some type of progress to occur. television is a form of terrorism. because it assumes its place is to provide its audience with an over-attentive over-saturation of mediated facts. it does nothing to enforce justice,relieve poverty, or preserve .

it is the highest form of terrorism because it commits itself to nothing. it promises only unmediated events yet is mediated by the television, by the act of teleprompting. by some big other. most terrorism is filtered through some sort of perverse other.

take for instance, in the life of one of ’ disciples, his name was peter. rome was a natural terrorist, they attempted to the world – reality is everyone knew it. their terrorism was visceral. any person, object or moment that attempt to destroy another person for their own self-gain is a natural terrorist. one who is led by nothing more/less than simple blood lust.

in a moment of sheer self-committed weakness peter becomes over-saturated by his own self-preservation and fear. his attentiveness to it is what drives his acts and words from that point forward. although his intent might be pure, his actions dictate the ‘other’ that he serves in that moment. for all intense purposes he is one of the terrorists who sent jesus to the .

now, this isn’t to demonise peters’ denial of , but the reality is that peter is a microcosm of what has happened to the world today. the cliche we have become accustomed to hearing is that bad things happen when good men do nothing. but i think there is a fatal flaw in this thinking.

Terrorism

because it assumes that the bad thing wouldn’t have occurred if the good man did . even when good men do , bad things still happen. like in the movie gran torino, the curmudgeonly protagonist played by clint eastwood ends up dying for the neighbours he loves to hate to imprison a set of gang members who antagonised their own family members who he became friends with.

but throughout the movie he encounters other gang members. what the movie does not deal with is the reality that his was ultimately in vain because it did not deal with all of the gangs. the system in place. however altruistic/salvific (he dies with he arms outstretched, like Christ) his did not deal with the systemic issue of gang violence.

it simply was a form of vengeance in reverse. true violence occurs when we allow those systems that oppress, marginalize, kill, devalue and destroy any human.

when we repress our innate responsibility not to just act but to dismantle those systems in place that dissolve the human spirit, we do nothing less, in that moment then join in the terrorism that ends the very life we ourselves stand for.

in its most simplest form, terrorism is when we allow systems to overrun how we interpret one another, our value, ethics & desire.

theorist Jean Baudrillard thought that images were evil. that over time the image would become so over-saturated (overused) that it would lose its meaning. and that the image itself would take the place of the object along with the meaning. so, even the meaning of the object would be replaced by whatever took its place. and that over the course of the process the ‘real’ thing would cease to exist in this thing we call reality. and we would worship the image over the pure (untouched object). this has also happened with god. god has been removed from churches, theology and everything in between. the object we are meant to relate to has become the very idol we ourselves choose to interpret and understand. this is why there has been a historical fe

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Vienna Doesn’t Mean That Much To Me…

The parallel existence of two concepts of perfection, one strict (“perfection,” as such) the other loose (“excellence”), has given rise — perhaps since antiquity but certainly since the Renaissance — to a singular paradox: that the greatest perfection is imperfection

so the apostle is meeting up some people in the middle of square called the areopagus in athens. was a place known by the locals as the place where philosophers went to talk about the latest fad. it was the center of popular beliefs and gossip, even spiritual fads too. one of the known features of particular geographic was pantheon or hall of gods. just to be safe these greek followers of zeus placed one statue right amongst the others and gave it a name: the unknown god.

the god who is a mystery, to the greeks has a name. irony? i think so. in fact, i think this whole episode is dripping with greek irony so much so that shakespeare might have wished he would have written this encounter. because i don’t think paul is attempting to change their beliefs, i also don’t think he is attempting to convert them in any way. i think that view trivializes the apparent sarcasm that is prevalent throughout the narrator’s explanation along with the nuances of this supposed conversation. take for example, when paul over-emphatically proclaims to his audience that they are ‘very religious’ (another translation uses the word superstitious).

i don’t think paul is being a door-to-door salesman here and trying to manipulate them with nice rhetoric, which christians have been blamed for doing in the past. rather i think he is doing something even more subversive, he is taking them to the end of their conclusions. he is sarcastically leading them through their belief system, again, not condemning it, but rather demonstrating the weakness of causality. he is saying: if you are this religious, then this ultimately is where it will you. in a sense, i think he is defending their unknown god. the greek word here for unknown is the same word we use for .

a tear in the natural order of knowing. a gap. a wound. a scar. a place where we cannot know.

then he starts to quote their philosophers, who in turn were speaking about zeus (EX: …’we live and move and have our being’…) but he uses the term God as we have it recorded to be. but he never once condemns their belief. he simply uses the term/title that he understands god as. his audience would have caught onto this. another reason why i think he was being sarcastic is the undercurrent of greco irony which displaces not only the character (the hall of gods;truth;knowledge – in this narrative) but the idea of fluidity or the militant claim that perfection has only one definition.

and so in this conversation we see paul pushing the boundaries of belief so far that he begins challenging his audience with their own beliefs. which again this wasn’t foreign to the greek philosophers. they would been more than okay with this approach. and so his over-identification of God (saying god has created everything and etc.) although it might be true in is more of an ideological catch-22. and in this moment is when the wheels begin turning, because paul is indirectly speaking back into the belief of this unknown god.

paul is speaking of this gap. this unknown.

and for me, this is the centerpiece of his conversation, not the god itself but rather the need for the unknown. for agnosticism. this is why he also says god cant be a statue. god is fluid. god is untouchable (this is different from claiming that god isn’t relatable). this is why ultimately things like theology, doctrine, dogma and etc. don’t work, because taken to the end of our conclusion we are with nothing more than a system of beliefs and no god to worship. paul i think is claiming the same thing. that they can believe in all kinds of different things and be into the latest fads (for christians, it might be the or open theism and so on), but ultimately we don’t know. and the irony that i think he is playing on here is that the unknown is the closest we get to faith. that unbelief is belief. that denial is acceptance. i am not naive enough to think that we can simply get away with absolving ourselves from community. for it is in the evolutionary development of religion that we find beliefs are created to pose a sense of community. i posit we don’t need beliefs to community, but rather we need each other to community.

we need to believe in each other to solidify this community. before i get called a heretic. let’s talk about hegel for a second. he once thought that the holy spirit was God emptying his/herself into humanity. the human bond. let’s go with this for this discussion. if hegel was right, then once we create ‘knowns’ we create distance between and the holy spirit (remember, this is hegels’: human bond) and so ultimately beliefs actually don’t create community, they distance from community.

they dismantle it.they destroy it. i am not saying we don’t need beliefs, but i am saying that if we truly desire community (some people term this church and etc.) then we must be willing to walk away from beliefs, no matter what side of the fence we’re on….

think about this on a social level…it is our superstitions that keep us from knowing each other. it is those things that create to keep ourselves safe from the unknown – the other stands in the place of the unknown. and represents that thing we fear the most. and so to dissociate ourselves from the other we are forced to betray the notion of loving our neighbour (the other) by including ideological barriers that keep us from connecting with the one we are meant to . beliefs are violent. they separate us from the object of our desire.

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the christless redemption.

Padah is the Hebrew idea behind redemption. It alluded an obligation one was under. It was also a self-imposed restriction, that someone knowingly walked into. Someone who was fully aware of what they were ‘tying’ themselves to. It wasn’t accidental. Redemption then is being saved from that self-imposed restriction. Redemption is seeing that there is more to what is now. Joseph sitting in the well somehow believed in redemption. His belief in it kept him living with an eye on redemption.

Biblica Judaica states that ‘redemption is salvation from the states or circumstances that destroy the value of human existence itself’”. Redemption then is about what it looks like to be a better humanity. Redemption than is about what we’re intentionally doing to liberate people from situations circumstances that denigrate their humanity.

In light of this, Christ than shows us each of us how to be Christs to others. It also shows us that we will all at one time or another need redemption, either individually or communally.

On the cross, Christ becomes Christless, because in that moment, he is need of a christ.

He knows this, and He looks to God who ‘turns his back’ on him. When we find what our crosses are, we must be willing to be rendered christless to allow others to come and redeem us. When we live out our lives as Christ we then perpetuate the message of THE Christ.

Now, I don’t want to seem like I am devaluing Christ’s contribution to our redemption. I think his redemption of mankind can be explained a bit differently though. I see Christ much like Martin Luther King Jr., in that MLKJ came to redeem the world from racial indifference amongst other things. Much like that, I think the redemption of Jesus was to demonstrated to us that is stronger than death, that the way to counteract oppression was through .

That love itself is another reality that we all aspire for. That love is the ultimate ethic that brings all of humanity together in harmony with one another and God. If you study the idea of Messiah in the time of Jesus, Jesus wasn’t the only messiah, in fact, the term messiah was used by prophets even in the Old Testament.

In this instance, for example, I believe the Conversation in Emergence is redeeming the from its self-imposed restrictions. I believe in a purely salvific sense, this conversation might be one of many needed saviours to get the out of the mess its gotten itself into.

A parent who saves their child from a fire they accidently started is one of many saviours in that child’s lives, that parents play a large in that child’s developmental understanding of what it means to be redeemed.

Much like in my , my adopted parents redeemed me from a life that could have been hell on earth. They were one of my many saviours. The ancient Jews use the word avengers. Someone who comes in and avenges the death or memory of the person who is being avenged.

In light of this new information the cross takes us in a different direction than the idea of sin. It isn’t about how bad we are, or how we need to redeem us from the bad its about how we are redeeming good. Another place described redemption as Glory returning back to God. That all is as it should be.

What about personally though, what does it say to us now? It means we have to be willing to be estranged from our prisons. We get very used to the things that make us feel safe even if they aren’t the best for us. We get used to the cells we have somehow had a hand in making. Redemption is the willingness to pry through those bars. It it being released from something we think we don’t need releasing from.

Redemption also brings us into unknown/uncharted territory. It brings you into the places of the beyond. Beyond what was. Beyond what is. Beyond the statu quo. Beyond the proven paths of convention. It strips you from all of the things that you called home and leaves you in the barren wasteland* – redemption leaves you without nothing more than yourself and an open canvas to discover what it looks like to int barreness. Redemption is the hope that is in the dry land that spurs us even beyond itself.

Redemption calls us from the beyond to journey to the beyond.

Source(s):

Bablyonian Talmud –http://www.scribd.com/doc/5533605/The-Babylonian-Talmud-Complete-Soncino-English-Translation

www.bloomington.in.us/~okolicko/definitions-2.html

http://www.kolhamevaser.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/05/khm-halakhah-and-minhag-iii-72_r.pdf

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christ

http://ext.sagepub.com/cgi/pdf_extract/115/3/76

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It Was Almost Enough To Make Me Stop Believing

is a spoken word poem which is technically written to be spoken heard rather than read.

Go here if you are interested in hearing the poem.


It Was Almost Enough To Make Me Stop Believing. by Liz Dyer

Defacto segregations

Emotional manipulations

Personal salvations

ALL the proclamations.

I had taken the bait

Walked through the narrow gate

Learned what to hate

Was certain of my eternal fate.

I could spew the roman road, so proud, so bold, part of the fold, and believed what I was told.

I’m in – you’re out – no doubt what I’m talking about

I know – I’m – I’m the one walking in the light

You lose – I win – come on, I’ll point out your sin.

Prostituting every opportunity

Wanting to be the supermajority

Working to oppress homosexuality

Don’t forget about being offended by profanity.

Let’s hang out in our bubble

Let’s try to stay out of trouble

Don’t wander away from the holy huddle.

Forget about conversation – debate for domination – practice your presentation – and talk about eternal damnation.

Pick a verse to justify being chauvinistic

Deny it when they say you are legalistic

Preach a gospel that is individualistic

Forget that it seems a little imperialistic.

Don’t question the authority, know what’s a priority, don’t worry about the minority, that’s our expository.

The Christianization – the dehumanization

The demonstration – the incorporation

Made ME start to question.

What about the brotherly ?  The justice that was spoken of ?

The one we were in awe of?  The mercy they talked of?

Didn’t they get the memoranda that we were supposed to love with no agenda?

Didn’t they notice the lack of transformation? The absence of civil conversation?

Weren’t we supposed to be known by our fruits instead of by our refutes?

Weren’t we supposed to make the world a better place full of love and hope and grace?

Where was the creativity?  The spirit of generosity?  The chance for serendipity?

Thank I broke free!

Cause it was almost enough to make me stop believing.

Copyright 2010. All Rights Reserved.

My name is Liz and I am a follower of Christ who lives in Texas (Dallas/Fort Worth area).  I am married and have two sons.  I enjoy reading, blogging, listening to music, going to movies, the emergent conversation, traveling and hanging out with friends and family. I blog at Grace Rules (http://gracerules.wordpress.com/ ).  I named my blog Grace Rules because although I have a history of letting things like rules, regulations, law, convictions, and stuff like that rule my , I am determined to become a woman who is ruled by grace and love.

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a review on Karen Armstrong’s ‘The Bible: A Biography’ by CharisManglican

The Bible, A Biography

(1) Tell us a bit of your story.

I became a at the age of 12 at a camp run by independent, ‘non-denominational’ evangelical churches. From that time on I was always been in volunteer ministry, whether as a youth coach or a worship leader, and the church of my youth grow from about 80 800.

In the late nineties I began to engage postmodernism through popular Christian authors. First came Soul Tsunami by Leonard Sweet. I read Finding Faith by Brian McLaren a bit late. Thus began a seven-year deconstruction of my faith. I self-identified as part of the church. I read voraciously. I started to ‘get’ why me and my friends, all dedicated to Christ, nonetheless were restless and dissatisfied with the churches and the Christianity that we grew up with. In some ways it felt liberating: I didn’t feel alone in my dissatisfaction. I was getting rid of all sorts of ‘bad faith’. In other ways it was intimidating: what would remain at the end of my deconstruction? Because everything I believed was under scrutiny, I had no idea what faith would look like or if it would exist at the end of the journey. I had confidence in what I did NOT believe, but I wasn’t sure of what I DID believe. I had a vague feeling that God wanted me to actually do something. When and how would I fit some ‘construction’ in? When I shared my anxiety with a good friend of mine, he casually quoted Ecclesisastes: “There’s a time to tear down, and a time to build.” It was a relief somehow.

A time to build would come.

One of the more dramatic events during this period in my life was that I was excommunicated from the church of my youth. Not only had my paradigm let me down…now I was actually being abandoned by my spiritual family. My skepticism was at an all-time high. I thought I still believed in the church, but I didn’t know where she was. I started to think that God had withdrawn his Spirit from the West. I tried to find another church, but most were pretty much the same. We explored a church with no name that met in a kickboxing studio. We tried home church. We tried staying at home and playing video games. I can think of no better word than ‘grace’ to describe how I avoided total cynicism regarding the church. Instrumental in that grace were these five authors: Brian McLaren, N.T. Wright, John Howard Yoder, William Cavanaugh and Stanley Hauerwas. After about a year of being ‘ecclesially homeless’, my family somehow fell into the liturgical tradition. We are a part of St. Alban’s, a small Episcopal church in Yucaipa, . I just gave my first sermon as a lay witness.

In studying post-liberalism and the early church, I have come to see non-violent, self-giving, enemy-love at the heart of the gospel. I call myself a Christian anarcho-pacifist as my way of teasing out the implications of this discovery. I’m attempting to live simply and to peacefully participate in giving and receiving in with all earth’s creatures.

Last year I left my job as a top-producing mortgage consultant to homeschool my kids, for my wife’s business and to begin organic farming. I told my wife once that I now know why Jesus self-identified as ‘the way’ rather than ‘the destination’. He keeps taking me on new adventures.

(2) What has influenced your belief system?

What hasn’t?

I used to make my living as a rock musician. People would ask us what style we were or who were our influences. While I have my favorite music, we were literally influenced by everything. I was influenced by John Steinbeck and by shampoo commercials. Whether I liked it or not, it influenced me. I have come to think of faith that way.

Currently I’m reading a book on home-scale permaculture (Gaia’s Garden). This is heavily influencing me. Last night I watched Michael Moore’s “Sicko”. It’s influencing me. Post-liberalism has caused me to live at peace with my historical contingency, and even revel in it. So while I can critique postmodernism as simply late western modernism, I’m not unaware at how my habits of thought are culturally postmodern. In order to understand, I’m willing to ‘stand under’ a multitude of teachers and let influence me. Engage critically, but engage.

 
(3) What book are you reading now, and why that one?
 

After Virtue, by Alasdair MacIntyre. It’s not an easy read. I’m taking it on because of the influence MacIntyre has had on the five authors that I mentioned earlier (N.T. Wright’s newest book, for example).

Here’s a juicy bit I just read:

“Contemporary moral experience…has a paradoxical character. For each of us is taught to see himself or herself as an autonomous moral agent; but each of us also becomes engaged by modes of practice, aesthetic or bureaucratic, which involve us in manipulative relationships with others. Seeking to protect the autonomy that we have learned to prize, we aspire ourselves not to be manipulated by others; seeking to incarnate our own principles and stand-point in the world of practice, we find no way open to us to do so except by directing others towards those very manipulative modes of relationship which each of us aspires to resist in our own case. The incoherence of our attitudes and our experience arises from the incoherent conceptual scheme which we have inherited.”

He traces the history of this incoherence from contemporary philosophy back to the ancient world. This work is considered one of the most lucid deconstructions of western modernism.

(4) You just read The Bible: A Biography by Karen . What in the book would you say agree with?

 

I’m not sure I have the standing to agree or disagree with Ms. Armstrong. My areas of study have touched on historical criticism, but only in a very limited sense. It might make more sense to say what I liked about the book.

And I did like the book. Karen is obviously a great teacher. I wasn’t prepared for the historical scope. I guess I thought she would address the beginnings of the scriptures among those peculiar nomads in the middle east, but I didn’t know that she’d continue to trace developments all the way through the twentieth century. This is the strength of the book: it is an overview of the compilation and interpretation of the Hebrew and Christian scriptures covering about three thousand . And she tells it in such a way that is almost like a novel. It’s a page-turner.

 

(5) What are some areas you might disagree with and why?

 

My favorite authors give me a sense of their struggle, a sense of their editorial choices. For example, in A People’s History of the United States, Howard Zinn is very forthright about his editorial choices. In a very different sort of book (A Severe Mercy), C.S. Lewis lays bare the vulnerability of his faith in the face of suffering. The Bible: A Biography may not have been a page-turning overview if Armstrong gave a full account of her historical vision, but I can’t escape the feeling that she’s simply good at teaching other people’s conclusions. I would have liked the book more if it didn’t pretend to objectivity, if it instead revealed the author’s own struggle and choices. I’m left wondering: is Karen Armstrong aware of her own historical contingency?

 
(6) Do you think Karen Armstrong has something to say to the Church (at large)?
 

It’s a shame that so many Christians have a ‘magical’ view of the scriptures. (It’s also important to note that this is not always the case in traditional churches; Pope Benedict and Archbishop of Canterbury Rowan Williams come to mind as church leaders who publicly engage historical criticism.) If I were teaching an introductory course on the history of the scriptures, I wouldn’t mind using this book.

However, I would want to balance it out with other works that address the theological and philosophical choices we make and why. Why do we think the way we do? History, theology, philosophy and politics were impoverished in the modern age by their isolation as separate disciplines, engaged only by ‘experts’. Zinn has demonstrated that history should be understood politically. Wright says that “Christianity appeals to history, so to history we must go.” Slavoj Zizek the atheist philosopher critically engages John Milbank the social critic…and both do theology.

When a theologian doesn’t understand ‘the history of theology’, or a historian doesn’t understand ‘the philosophy of history’ and so on, error is immanent. That Christians have a ‘magical’ view of the scriptures is not likely to be cured by historical facts, but rather by a wider engagement with other disciplines.

 (7) Do you think she represents a scholarly version of the postmodern conversation?

I actually think that Armstrong is vulnerable to postmodern critique. As I said, she seems to speak from objectivity rather than historically contingency. And because ‘the postmodern conversation’ has collapsed the neat boundaries between the disciplines (history, ethics, science, theology, philosophy, the arts), I’m not sure Armstrong’s book has the breadth necessary to be considered scholarly in our context.

In 1996 Jack Miles won a Pulitzer Prize for God: A Biography. To me this symbolized the mainstreaming of a postmodern shift in regards to the scriptures. The prominent questions have become more broad than mere historical accuracy: “What kind of book is this? What does this have to say? Why is this book here?” It’s the difference between studying a frog by dissection and studying a frog by observing it in its natural habitat.

I’ve been participating in a course from The Teaching Company in which Amy Jill Levine teaches the Old Testament as myth, saga and history. I’ve been reading William Cavanaugh’s radical visions of Christianity (ironically not proposing anything very new, but rather born of a deep exploration of Church history). Zizek uses Lacanian  Psychoanalysis to discuss how German toilets differ from French and American toilets. MacIntyre published After Virtue in 1981. In comparison to these, Armstrong’s book (published in 2007) seems neither very scholarly nor postmodern. In fact, it seems quite conservative, hearkening back to the time when history, like science, had its own inviolable corner of the truth.

(8) Anything else you would like to add/thoughts/critiques/questions/challenges
Because Armstrong doesn’t make explicit her viewpoint, I couldn’t help but detect what I thought was an implicit bias.

In her last chapter (“Modernity”) she reviews the thought of Michael Fishbane, Professor of Jewish Studies at Chicago University and author of The Notion of a Sacred Text. She quotes a passage from Fishbane where he presents Isaiah’s eschatological vision of all the nations converging on the city of peace, then another pasage where the prophet Micah talks about each nation going forward “each in the name of its own god.” Armstrong says: “It is almost as though Micah foresaw our own time of multiple visions converging on a common truth, which for Israel had been expressed by the idea of their god.” I thought the idea of mankind ‘converging on a common truth’ has been discredited by continental philosophy and postmodern deconstruction.

And what is the ‘common truth’ being offered to us? I can’t tell if Armstrong is quoting Fishbane approvingly or disinterestedly. But I can hazard a guess.

Armstrong seems delighted throughout her book when she writes of Jewish and Christian communities whose exegesis of scripture appears as proto-democratic liberalism. This thread of thought is thoroughly steeped in modernism. What does the Enlightenment mean, after all, but that Western Civilization has the true light…that we represent progress, peace and freedom? In the words of Francis Fukuyama, liberal democratic capitalism is “The End of History.” But what do you do if history refuses to stop?

In regards to Philosophy: The meta-narrative of history as progress and enlightenment has been discredited.

In regards to Theology: The belief that the ancient Jewish prophetic tradition was an appetizer for the prophets of Adam Smith and Thomas Jefferson is idolatry. In regards to Politics: This false universality shows no signs of culminating in Isaiah’s eschatological vision. Instead, it has led to and empire.

About Joey Aszterbaum,  a failed rock star and banking burnout who lives on a small farm in San Jacinto with his wife Jolynne (a wedding photographer) their four children, two other small families. He loves Jesus, non-violence, homeschooling, movies, post-liberal theology and farm-fresh eggs. He blogs over at CharisManglican, check it out: www.Charismanglican.com

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Falling for my gay friend

Meet the author: Neil Christopher is an author, human rights, animal rights and environmental activist, and founder of evolition — an interfaith collective focusing on promoting and empowering the emerging conversation in not only Christian churches, but in other faiths as well. Website: http://www.evolitionist.com

Being friends with people is nothing new me; I never really thought much about it. Even though I was the son of a pastor and was raised in a very fundamentalist setting; something never really sat right in my spirit about the way they viewed homosexual and bisexual people, and even though at that time I had no science or theology back up my personal convictions – I stuck !

My first real encounter was as a Junior in High School. A classmate of mine, that I didn’t really know, “came out” and I found out that he was being attacked for it. It just didn’t sit right with me, so the next day when I walked into the lunchroom and found him sitting alone I came and sat with him. The rest of my friends soon followed suit (I kept good company) and we organized a little “protest” where a bunch of us “straight” guys came to school in drag. First time I ever shaved my chest, and man was that ever itchy. Not recommended.

I have also always been aware of how negative and closed minded gender stereotypes can be. One of my first girlfriends was always classified by others gay because she was such a tomboy. She looked and acted so much like a boy that when we went out on dates people would drive by yelling “fags” at us for kissing or holding hands. I was also at many times on the other end of that sick because although I attracted to females, I must admit that I am an effeminate male. I don’t play sports, I have a small frame, I love art, music, and was involved in theatre and other such things. I normally got along with girls better than guys, and was always OK with that. I am comfortable in my own skin.

I remember as a Senior having a very popular male athlete in school ask me is I would like to hang out sometime. He was huge, scruffy, attractive… as butch as they get. Nobody would assume that he was gay, but I soon learned that he was. After I explained to him that I was straight, he said he doubted it and that I was just not “out” yet because of my not adhering to certain social roles or expectations. However, he failed to see the irony or the hypocrisy in his assumptions; because there he was, as a very non-effeminate gay male, breaking out of that stereotype but still placing the old ones on me.

It wasn’t until I moved to San Francisco that I really got to see all kinds of walls and boundaries pertaining to this issue come down and get removed. To be honest, over there I never really knew who was what, and was pleased to be living in a place where none of us really gave a damn.

It was here that I also learned something else about homosexuality – if it really is to be taken as a valid expression of love then the same rules apply to it as heterosexuality. Being gay does not mean that you have to be promiscuous; that’s just being promiscuous. Being gay does not mean that you have to be effeminate or butch; that’s an entirely different matter all together. Being gay does not mean that someone is loose or perverted; no more than being straight makes us all faithful saints to our partners and respectful sexually to others. That’s just people being people, and has nothing to do with their sexuality.

It also means (and I know I may piss off a few people here) that if there are people out there living a heterosexual lifestyle due to “nurture” but who were actually born gay and are in the closet, that there are also cases where “nurture” has influenced people who were born straight into a homosexual lifestyle.

Now, please don’t get me wrong. I do believe and know that people are born gay or born straight. I know the ethics and the science behind that, and even before I knew the facts I already knew that in my heart. All I am saying is that since homosexuality is on an even playing filed with heterosexuality that it is possible for this situation to occur equally in both circumstances. I see no difference between the two forms of expression and therefore don’t apply different rules to them both. If I did, that would not be equality.

For example, I became friends with a girl in Arizona who identified as a lesbian, but later on expressed interest in me and decided that she must actually be bisexual, and later as straight. We dated, and through getting to know her I soon learned that she never had a real impulse or attraction to females until much later on in her life where a certain circumstance happened that made her distrust men. She now in this day identifies herself as straight. I do not believe this to be the standard, but is a case of a valid exception.

To be fair, we would have to also assume that the opposite is true as well. That there are certain people who were born gay but who are drawn into a heterosexual lifestyle from social pressure, upbringing, fear, religion, past hurts in a homosexual lifestyle, abuse or some other matter. We have a term for this (being in the closet) and a term for getting out of this bad situation (coming out), but many fail to validate and give merit to those on the opposite side of this predicament.

For persons trapped in either side of the closet, I hope that all we really want is for this person to come to love themselves, be happy, and live in an environment where they are free to be who they are: gay, straight or bi. It should be out goal to live in a society where people are free to be happy in their sexual self-expression either way, and it should not be seen as losing one from our team or gaining one to the other. There’s just one team – the human race.

I must admit though, that as open-minded as I am, and as supportive of gay rights that I am, I still have no clue what it would be like to be gay. I care, but I can’t exactly relate. As a human though, we can all identify with our common feelings of pain, loneliness, love, fear, rejection, desire and more recently the frustration that comes from not being able to express or fulfill those desires.

Let me explain… I have a crush on my gay friend. And there is nothing I can do about it.

We can’t choose who we are attracted to, no more than we can choose what colors, smells or foods we like. Not more than we can control when we are hungry, or what we hunger for. It just kind of happens, and it is anything but logical. For if it were logical, I’d just pick or decide to be attracted to someone who could assure me that they would be a good mate to me and fulfill some list of criteria that I have – being straight and actually attracted to me would be pretty high up on that list.

But there I was, minding my own business and enjoying a slam poetry night at a local bar with some friends, when she walked in. I noticed her as soon as the door opened, and just couldn’t take my eyes off her. I’m sure my jaw dropped, and my heart skipped – it raced even more as to my surprise she made her way to where we were all sitting. Oh my , she knows my friends? And she joined us for the rest of the event.

As she plopped down on the bench and sat cross legged, as I do but unlike all the others, I immediately thought that this was my kind of person. Her shoes were even low-top Vans – hell I even liked the way she smoked and held her cigarette. Was she beautiful? Yes. Was this just physical attraction? No. No I can tell you with all certainty that it was not just that. Yes, she had physical features I find appealing, but many people do and that is not something I generally concentrate on. I don’t have a “type.”

It had more to do with some kind of instinct, emotion, or a gut feeling that she was just a like-spirit. It is more unexplainable that that. And then just to notice the way she sat, talked, smiled, dressed… the way she carried herself – gave out hints and a window into her personality, outlook or “self” that was even more appealing to me. It’s more like meeting someone and immediately knowing that you like them, and then the rest of the conversation/meeting is discovering why.

Oh, but we had not actually talked yet. I was too nervous for that.

We did eventually talk, and for me this is the point when meeting any new person that attraction flies out the window. No matter what I “feel” towards a person upon instinct or first observation, once they open up their mouths and speak if they are boring, annoying, conceited, stupid or ignorant, I no longer hold any kind of attraction towards them. Most pretty people become surprising ugly once they actually speak.

Fortunately (or unfortunately, depending) this was not the case. She was engaging, captivating, and we soon delved into a conversation so deep and long that the others at the table soon dismissed themselves to find other things to do. By the end of the night, I never assumed that I had found a girl that was interested in me (because I am never that cocky), but I had been assured that I found an awesome new person whose company I certainly did enjoy and that I wanted to know more. But yes, attraction was there – although only from my viewpoint.

For as the group gathered together again to pay our tabs and walk out of the bar, her and another friend of mine grabbed hands and walked out together. Once on the street they embraced, and I came to the realization that her and my friend were . Not only is this person taken; not only by a friend of mine, but this friend also happens to be a female. So triple whammy: taken, by friend, and is gay.

I felt kind of stupid and embarrassed. But not shocked. I am very used to everything in life, and was at fault for assuming not only that she was straight, but also that since she was talking to me that this automatically meant there was some kind of interest on her part.

It is a very dumb, male attribute, to assume that just because you meet an awesome person of the opposite sex and feel some kind of connection to them that this for some reason means you are supposed to screw them.

I mean, we meet cool people all the time, and it is not like we apply this same “logic” the rest of the great individuals we meet. I have met many males with whom I felt were like-minded spirits, but did I try to screw them? No. Or what about a much older or much younger person? Not at all. So I slapped myself upside the head for falling into the trap of douche-bag male, and decided that I would place attraction aside and if this person still wanted to get to know me as just a person, that I was totally game for that.

Some time has gone by since then, and I never really thought about “liking” her again. That was simply off limits, and I have been really enjoying getting to know her as a person. The more we talked and hung out the more I knew my first instincts were right – she is simply an amazing person and I’m so happy to know her. I look forward to seeing her, love to hear what she has to say in any conversation, and when having a bad night out I seem to pick up as soon as she enters the room. Once we get talking about life, religion, politics… whatever – it lasts for hours and hours on end. I always walk away from those moments feeling better as a person for it and thrilled to simply know her.

Something happened though a few nights ago. We always hang out in public, in group settings, but the other night we just hung out alone for the first time at my place. I didn’t really think about it, but I was nervous. It was not some conscious thing, but I cleaned the house, made sure I looked halfway decent, and was a bundle of nerves. When she first came in it even took me a while to feel comfortable enough to sit down on the same couch as her. I felt very awkward, but I could not figure out why. It’s just my buddy who came over. So what’s all the fuss about?

Eventually I chilled out, and we got to our normal talking and swapping of life stories. Towards the end of the night the topic switched to her personal story of “coming out”; what lead to that, her life before that, and her life as it is now.

She talked about trying to be with guys before, and how some of them were perfectly nice guys; attractive, loving, caring, and faithful – whatever. But how there was just always something missing, incomplete, and something in her gut that was never happy, until now of course. I was trying to relate it that, as best as I could as a straight person, but I didn’t really “get it”… yet. I had sympathy but not empathy.

The conversation then changed to sexual tension and frustration. She spent some time trying to explain to me how hard it is for a gay person to really be able to express themselves in this world we live in. I mean, imaging living in a world where you feel as though you can’t act out on some of the simplest, base desires? To be that kid in High School who feels attracted to your friend of the same sex but is too afraid to even let them know. To be afraid of how they would take it, of how it could end the friendship, of knowing that it is off limits – imagine the amount of frustration and the swallowing of emotions that must take place; the suppression.

Imagine having a desire that you feel as though you can’t act out on, and not a bad one, but one as pure and simple as love itself. Imagine feeling as though it would be wrong to do it, and living in a society where the odds are that the other person will probably not feel the same way. To make it even worse, one where still many people today treat it as though it is a sickness – that it makes you either a bad person, or at least a broken one in need of some fixing.

It was then that I was hit with a realization that quickly moved me sympathy to empathy. Because as I looked at her I realized that, despite whatever I had told myself going into this, I was still attracted to her.

I felt empathy, because I realized that I know, I know without a shadow of a doubt that I feel this but can never act out on it. She will never feel the same way, I have been hiding it, suppressing it, and it has been eating me up inside. I too have been living a bit of a lie. I also understood at that moment that just as I can never change the fact that I am attracted to her, she can never change the fact that she is attracted to , and never will be to me. I saw her, for a brief second, as a male that I was attracted to who was only attracted to females and felt a glimpse of something I never really understood before.

I cannot mentally will these feelings away, or replace it with logic; no more than she can will herself into an emotion for me or any other man. Hell, considering the times we live in and the amount of pressure and oppression to gay if they could, wouldn’t many have “willed away” certain feelings? For me the only risk is a bit of a broken heart, but for them it can mean a loss of family, religion, friends, jobs, fear, hate, insults and even physical harm. No. Nobody chooses to be gay.

Am I a crappy friend for finding this person attractive? Do I need to feel guilt for a certain uncontrollable impulse or emotion? For being wired the way that I am wired? I think not. No more than they can help or control their non-interest in, have no reason to feel bad over it, and cannot change or control their situation or feelings.

I have always been friends with, supportive of, and an advocate for the gay community. But it has always been as an outsider, as someone who has no way of fully understanding what it is that you are going through. And I am still that outsider, but today I can tell you that I understand a little bit more; because we are all humans, and we all share the same basic human needs and emotions. I don’t understand the scale of the things you are going though, but I know what it is like to love, to want to be accepted, desired, to feel pain, rejection or fear.

I believe in a God who loves us all, and I am thankful for this and many other life-lessons Life has put me through to turn me into a more compassionate individual. I believe that God is always trying to work in this world in different ways to bring about positive change in the way we humans all get along and deal with one another. I believe that He/She is always speaking; I only pray that more people begin to listen.

So what’s next for me and my friend? I don’t really know. I have to get over the fact that I desire them and enjoy their company as a human being. I don’t believe that’s “settling” more than evolving. Hopefully they will be patient with me, and understand that there is nothing I can do about my attraction for females no more than they can do anything about their attraction towards females. Hell, there’s yet one more thing we have in common.

Thanks God for the life lesson, but maybe next time you can just send a good book my way or something? This one stung a little bit.

Meet the author: Neil Christopher is an author, human rights, animal rights and environmental activist, and founder of evolition — an interfaith collective focusing on promoting and empowering the emerging conversation in not only Christian churches, but in other faiths as well. Website: http://www.evolitionist.com

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genderless christianity: why women should be treated as equal

racism sexism speciesism

Many Kabbalists conceive of God as embodying both male energies, which were divided during creation as part of the process of emanation. They speak of the shekhinah, which in traditional Judaism the divine presence on earth, as the feminine aspect or mystical bride of God.

The Hebrew word used to denominate God in Genesis is Elohim. This word is a plural formed from the feminine singular ALH (Eloh) by adding IM to it.

The ancient desert wanderers who encountered God on their 40-year outdoor camping trip experience God not only as a Him, but also as a her. The Jews nicknamed the glory of God ‘Shekinah’, it connoted the presence of God. Shekinah in the Hebrew tense is female. The personification of God’s fame (hebrew idea of glory modernized means ‘fame’) is female rather than male. I think this is an important distinction that can be too easily glossed over. God isn’t simply male or female. God embodies both. God created both.

It seems that there is still a silent expectation in many churches that males are to be leaders. males are to the way. males are the ‘head of the household’. the latter model tends to be the predominant archetype for a good christian husband. the guy who is the ‘bread-winner’, who is in charge and has it all together. this kind of approach doesn’t take into account the holistic nature of god. it only endorses an imbalanced worldview on god. and so then it puts us in a position where we support a one-sided paradigm, which hurts men and women. I would even go so far as to say if we willingly choose to see the male as a dominant one that we denigrate the full character of God. That if we choose to mistreat, abuse or control women in the name of misunderstood decontextualized verses, that we have become followers of a decontextualized collection of cultural documents that have somehow landed in the unintentionally uneducated hands of people who are trying to work out their theories of control on others.

 I know that sounds harsh, and I realize I may be coming from a place where I have seen men use scripture to beat women and cheapen their value as a integrated part of humanity, but this doesn’t devalue the reality that all women have to add to society, to culture, to our understanding of scripture, ethics, psychology and etc. What this means for men, is that we have a responsibility to not only intentionally step down and allow equal space and footing for women to develop themselves but to also seek out opportunities to rebuild the DNA of our society and churches towards a gender equilibrium that would rival and redeem the years lost. Without women we could not understand the feminine heart of God. We would not be able to understand the heart. The emotion. The passionate mother heart of God. We would have an incredibl anemic view of God which would give us a lopsided view of divinity.

Paul at one point in his letter says something to this : “…there is neither Jew nor Greek…male nor female….” — Paul was being counter cultural to the script of his own day. He was promoting a genderless society. one that saw humanity as one, not segregated by gender. not him or her, but people who demonstrated the vast creativity of God in their gender. Maybe this is what we need, is to be counter-cultural to our own society, to our churches, and to our maladjusted misinterpretations of scripture. God is beyond them as well as beyond our genders. We need something better.

We should intentionally step aside and allow and even advocate for women to be treated as equals, not as a helper. Not as one who needs permission from a male figure to do any such thing. In fact, as men, we simply treat women as equals. In a society that is still quite male-centered, if we choose equality over habitualized culture, we might just turn the tide. It is possible. We can do it, but we have to start now.

Also check out my wife’s blog (she is a Gender Rights Advocate) who has some great thoughts on the subject:

                                                                           http://womanami.blogspot.com

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living out of our divine spark: making dreams come true

a offering on how all of humanity living out of the embedded within.

The Divine Spark

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CSW welcomes inquiry into Burma crimes against humanity

CSW welcomes inquiry into Burma crimes against humanity.

Christian Solidarity Worldwide has welcomed the UK Government’s support for a UN investigation into crimes against humanity in .

British ambassador to the UN, Mark Lyell, yesterday backed the recommendation by the UN’s Special Rapporteur to Burma earlier in the month for a commission of inquiry to be set up.

He said the UK Government would support the referral of a case to the International Criminal Court ().

“Because Burma is not a state party to the ICC it would require the Security Council to make a reference, and I don’t think the Security Council is sufficiently unanimous in its view to allow such a reference to happen. We of course would support such a reference,” said Mr Lyell.

CSW has pressed for a commission of inquiry for several and last week reported fresh evidence of serious human rights abuses.

CSW’s Team Leader Rogers said: “We are delighted that the United Kingdom is showing leadership on issue, and has pledged strong support for the Special Rapporteur’s recommendations.

“It is vital that in the run-up to the regime’s fake elections, its crimes against humanity and the prevailing culture of impunity in Burma are addressed by the , and is taken to end the regime’s campaign of rape, forced labour, torture, destruction, killing and terror.”

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learning from god in process.

The Message

The moment you read this a moment that you can never take back has just passed. Time has moved forward, it has progressed above beyond our .

The petal that just fell off the flower that you and I weren’t around to see will never fall again. No matter how many winters this flower may experience, there will never be another petal like that ever again.

The breath you exhaled in the middle of the conversation you had earlier will never be the same breath you exhale from that moment forward. In a sense, you have breathed your last breath in that moment.

Time moves forward, it progresses, it breathes and flowers through our existence. Everything is in process. All of life is in process.

The first time I scraped my knee, I learned to make sure that the next time I scraped my knee that it wasn’t for the same reason. I learned, I progressed, as we all do.

What if God does that too?

Process says that God evolves. Which is very much in line with Eastern Judaic that defines perfection as something that perpetuates. Perfection progresses. God is in progress. God learns, he evolves.

There are several ambigous places in scripture that seem to support this.

In the conversation with Abraham about his nephew Lot who lived in the city of Sodom and Gomorrah; God was willing to barter and debate with Abraham on the value of a soul. Which I truly think is the point of the , not whether a city was historically destroyed or not.

Then God changes his mind in conversation with his friend Moses, a leader of the Israelite people who challenges God on his thinking. Almost essentially accusing God of being close/narrow-minded. And God backs off.

There are a handful of others where demonstrates that he is in process.

Another example is in the fabled creation narrative where the author describes the world as being formless. The word in Hebrew for formless means wasteland. It assumes something was there before. That God could have possibly created another earth(s) before ours and was in the process of learning.

Again, in the eastern mindset perfection was demonstrated in growth. And this is incredibly encouraging because it allows us to see that we ourselves should not have to feel guility about ‘arriving’, in fact if God hasn’t ‘arrived’ according to our definitions than maybe it means that life isn’t about ‘arriving’ or coming to all the answers, maybe what it means is that life is the endless beautiful journey where us to better and so on and so forth. Maybe this is what means to learn from a .

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